14 years ago I was in demand as a woman in tech. I ran a review site for consumer gadgets, and got involved in multiple tech roundtables to help shape how companies marketed to supported women. I was even recognised for my work, being named as a “Remarkable Woman” and winning awards. I worked on major campaigns with some of tech’s biggest names and featured in global adverts for companies like Nokia and Microsoft. I put my heart and soul into my work as a tech blogger and as a social media/ community manager.
A year on, I got married and a year after that, I had a little boy. This is when things really changed. I returned to work and blogging after maternity, but childbirth had highlighted some serious health issues. This led to me having to leave work and pause my website, so I could focus on recovery.
I spent 2 years, in and out of hospital, away from my young son and husband. It was heart breaking, but together we worked through it and, after a few years, I briefly returned to my tech reviewing. Getting back into the scene was difficult, but I’ve always worked hard for my achievements.
Unfortunately, I ended up having to refocus on my family as my son started school and was struggling. He was my priority, my number one. Once again, blogging took a back seat.
In 2016 I took on my husband’s son, who was undiagnosed, but had suspected autism. I became mum to not one, but two children, both challenged and challenging in their own way. It was a journey and a story for another time… It was hard.
Fast forward to 2018. My son was thriving due to the attention and support I gave him, but was undergoing assessments that would later see him diagnosed with ADHD combined type. My stepson had also finally been diagnosed with Autism and impaired hearing. As a mum, I couldn’t have been prouder of my brave boys and of myself for staying fierce and never giving up on what sometimes felt like a thankless and disorganised process.
In mid 2018, I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and, thanks to my husband’s encouragement, I became a software tester: an area I never thought I could break into. I have no degree or qualifications, but I do have a great testing mindset and a talent for spotting things that are wrong, or ways to improve journeys, processes and systems. I love to think outside the box. I excelled in my new career, and it wasn’t long before I was making a name for myself.
To this day, I’m dedicated to improving teams, processes and software. Over the past year, the confidence in my ability has increased and I’m dying to share my knowledge to help improve teams and company culture.
Why am I telling you all of this, you may ask? Well, I’m now in my early 40’s and I’ve found myself in a vulnerable position. I’ve been made redundant twice in 5 years. When I was younger and childless, I was always in demand. These days, despite being wiser, more experienced and keen to bring positive change, I’m overlooked for younger, cheaper alternatives. Those without any “baggage”.
My husband remained the main breadwinner during this time, which we are all grateful for. His support for us has never wavered. He’s been our rock, and his career has gone from strength to strength over the years. Mine however has been turbulent. Men are considered in their prime when in their 40’s, however women regularly put their careers on hold to bring up their family. They maintain and even grow their skills in this time, but lose their “shininess” for recruiters and companies. It’s not that women are no longer ambitious. If anything, they’re out there to show the world they are still relevant and more skilled than ever! Personally, I feel like I’m at my peak, work wise and I want to bring value and positive change to the workplace.
I feel that I’m far more valuable to a company now, than I was 10 or 20 years ago. I’ve spoken to many women of my age and in my situation who feel the same. The mention of the school run can put companies off and it’s such a shame! They could be missing out on a great employee and the one person to really turn their culture and business around. Someone who is not just qualified and experienced for a role, but has gained valuable people skills through becoming a parent.
Companies, hiring managers and interviewers: please give mothers more of a chance. There’s so much that they can bring to a workplace that may be harder to tap into otherwise. We are still ambitious and we still want to be successful, but few people will give us a chance to shine. Be the change.